The Critic in Me

From blogs to Yelp, Ive carried on my very best details for cherished things.  What can I say?  Well I dont know, Im alarmed by the things I hear and my faith.

Bamboozled. Astonished.  These senses we've paid little attention in the rat race.  Ive sat on great food, attitudes, and places.
Gratitude.  Oh the peeps.  These treaures untold!  Ive been up and down.  Only centered when spellbound.

Has the critic deluded me?  The nerve inside to look past every thing has focused me in delights heavenly.

I Need to Know

2017 feels here already.  It's been 2016 long enough.  All in one year such a good year yet too much saddness too.  Pregnant, overweight, diabetic, homesick, c-section, unemployed, broke, benign cancer, and afraid.

Coming out of original order of being barren, eating greasy and sugary foods, vigorous work outs, smoking, working, having a few bucks, and being thin for me more or less introduced me to Hoosier Health, Woman, Infants, and Children nutrition plan for baby food benefits, Bubble Gum for cigarettes, Zumba for beginners, weekly blood and.urine.tests for gesyational diabeties, and 50 lbs extra of weight on my back and water retained knee caps.

New family and friends, old friends and family, breast pump, nipple cream, and at home nurses and baby development trainers too.  Happy New Year.  2017 like I vision is asleep yet here waiting for his bottle, and diaper change.  Most importantly love.

That Baby

Well the devotions have  been strong for.baby  Ethan.  He has a mild winter.  There isnt any snow.  And the temperature is high forties.  There is nothing.much to do about New.Year's Eve with the excitement of going out.

ALREADY as I blog and post I gotta go change a.big veey wet diaper on a happy little hippo, and feed him.  Hes told how happy he is with smiles and laughs, even the angels play while he sleeps and hes happy in his sleep.

WHY NOT?

The town was quite calm for New Year's Eve.  No snow had fallen, and temperatures remained steady in the low 40s. Three towns over from Highland is home.
Yet it wasnt until three summers ago that the home in Highland IN sold.

What a bold term sold.  I was ready to move on and the feelings of not ready as opposed to ready were the same, neutral.  It must have been the same grocery and fast food places that sent me to the edge of glory as Gaga would sing it.

I learned appreciation,collaboration, and rejection.  Success never rang more true, you have to have faith, sacrifice, patience, and hard work. And other things.  The sun was out today.  There isnt that white cold stuff out on the ground.

The holidays are almost over with the New Year. Theres too much alone time.  Theres no problem with that well maybe with the baby and the internet.

Taking advantage of people though is easy when you feel you need to and make it up later.  Then the dinners are the highlight to the days.  Cold winds can give u the bug.

Happy New Year
Kat

Smell That?

In the town of Darteood there isnt a smell in thr air that isnt food.  French fries, popcorn, or bread.  God it's annoying.  Sugar plum lotion must be nice.  I can only think about eating.

Ive chewed gum of all flavors, and still I can't wait to fill my hunger for Salmon grilled with capors, and onions.  I wish I could eat potatoes every day.  Fried,baked,teice baked, sauteed,roasted, or raw.

Christmas gifts are all opened.  So why do I even bother looking still to buy gifts?  No one is getting anything.  Even if I think of those who didnt get.anything, or eanted.anything cant have anything from me since I wont be seeing.them until next year. Who knows?

Yummy theres that finger licking good smell of hot crust.buns and chicken. All the lies and bull crap in the world cant take away the aroma of food that sets my mind at ease.

No disappointment or lifestyle can keep me from my God who gave me the keen aense of smell,touch, and taste.  Yes. Yes. Yes. AMEN to oven cooked foods.

My U2 Experience

Being sixteen years old, 7920 days ago feels made up.  Im so old now compared to then.  There wasnt much to do.  Sitting around listening to U2,Pearl Jam, Green Day, or STP were essentials to growing up in the peer pressures of the 90s.

Pop Tour blew our minds. We acted out in ways we my bf and I at the time would never do.  I ran passed bouncers with the help of my mom while my bf was left behind standing alone.  He smoked alot, it seemed cool the way the smoke covered his face then sucked back in on inhale. Wow the simple teenage years.

I read Walk On my first book after university, an autobiography of U2.  I had a large U2 photo print book stolen years ago before Google and other search engines.  Then my highschooligan boyfriend and I reunited for U2's 2015 tour at the United Center, Chicago,IL.

We are going on 37 years of age, half if that being fans of Bono, Larry Mullens, Adam Clayton and The Edge. Hope I spelled their names correctly.  Mind blowing entertainment.  Fun and exciting place to be so I very seen a collection of their Chicago show's respectively and thankfully.

Pour Some Salt on Me

pour some salt or pepper, garlic powder, okie let's not get eaten.  So many spices out there gosh.  So why salt? Well it is written we are the salt of the earth.  Salt seasons a rainy day and a bland day.  Salt flavors food and melts the ice so we dont kill ourselves walking and driving in the heat of the winter.

I love salt scrubs to exfoliate my skin.  And balance ingredients through the whole batch of dough.

Oh babie up. Oh maybe not. Woop yep. Oh nope.  Alright in the name of love,  Im cold, bland and sour from my head to my feet.  Ha. Well, It is written, whatever is hidden shall be seen, ahhh dont panic.  In other words it is written we dont put a lamp lit under the table but in top to light up the room.

And we are the light on the hill made of salt to light up the world.  Notice we are not the sugar or cayenne pepper of the earth but the salt.  Why not?  To be cont.

I cant probably guesstimate that sugar is  Bad and not a part of our food pyramid btw the Medditerreanean diet has a thumbnail size for meat group my fav pyramid but you have to be a herbivore not a meat lover.

Thay being said, the Greeks food pyramid are packed with great stuff I mean look at those Gladiators and Greek statues such as Oh nevermind thats another blog.

So we can't be the pepper of the earth or onion powder either or we would be sneezing and crying too much.  Thats my configuration of being the salt of the earth.

 

Good Tidings

"Let's Call the Whole Thing Off," Fred Estaire

Christmas gifts all year long in my plans for him, and her.  Looking at the roof tops frosted with sparkling snow glimmering aunshine and a blue sky.  Skimming price tags and hand bags for him and for her.

I couldn't just relax.  All the jazz and hocus pocus.  A feast of friends and Kris Kringles dance.  Locked doors to heavens and uninvited.  Loose ties, and loose ends of lies of what happened determining decisions of him and her.

Left then are spreading cracks and creavaces to fill with gifts of love and bliss worlds apart and cherry tarts twirling arts into a gift box or a gift card.

Twisting around gifts with cheer, places with beer.  And what gifts would bring the best from the heart other than we are worlds apart.  One day a year for thirty six so far filled with body oils and lotions, tampons, soaps, razors to start a new year of lady like devotions. Thank you mom and dad rhe best gifts Ive ever had!

Nothing too exciting and nothing to dull, how bout some sports tickets to go see the Chicago Bulls.  Or a trip to Kris Kringles. Hope this Christmas your gifts are filled with BBQ Pringles.

Giant SNOW

Snow comes and goes when invited or not.  We talk about snow and ice safety and security precautions to everyone.  What a sight of icicles and frozen banks of snow drifts splashed by artic blasts.  The snow falls gorgeous.

Fire places are great to have and use at this rime. Well big down feather coats too. Zumba beginners can love being indoors at this time.

Santa visit. Check.

Its nine pm in my hometown Highland, IN.  Its winter here in NW Indiana and the city has shed its final coat off and now Im back to a very simple life of putting my clothes out before bedtime, remembering to brush your teeth, and sleep eight hours a day.

Coffee and doughy nuts

Cheese and coffee sound good.  Crabs clawing back and forth over the kind of donuts they are eating.  Couldn't resist the doughy fresh raspberry jelly filled sugar donut.  Ive never tasted a fresher donut in my life.

Could it be my strong resistance on sweets. How can we forget Kris Kringle?  The spirit of giving and the sip of coffee with exciting new feelings of highs and lows better than sledding.

Cold nips, and toes in a quagmire of waiting and watching of snow falls nig and small.  Please renew my dvds one more.time.    I felt Kringle lookin in last night and the night before with a rush of blood to my head.

Too many donuts.  I eat the top off of peanuts or shredded coconut.

I think of a baby cub helpless in the forest without his mom when I see my sons little baby eyes.  Then I start to sing Lynryd Scynryds Simple Man lyric that goes all I want for you my pnly son is to be satisfied.  I guess it's just the same aong hed sing along to with his dads dad. Ancient music for good times with good coffee too.  

I mean who am 8

I to say?  Or not.  I mean after thousands of movied and cups of joe my God Ive no where close to being done tasting and seeing what I need to want to see and taste to get to finishing tasting and seeing dreaming over a movie and a good holiday cup if eggnog?  Kringle must be spinning me into good humor on a rollercoaster.  Kris Kingle just be nice to this little laddy as he dances for his daddy.  My little one here has been through nore than I could ever know about.find

Sky Blues

Thank you!  I want to close my eyes.  Habent had much eep. Sleep.  I meant sleep.  sometimes I can ask a centered question.  A question such as what is really bothering me.  You know?  The carrots I succumbed to tonight were baked with oil Nd salt.

I had al ittle smoothie which helps me to sleep.  Im dreaming of what to ask Krin gle.   ?  So do I have to stay awake with well that three week period Erik left to Paoli IN while in my.third trimester, and.All other dreaded--ditch the prego days are over and healing process begins.

It was those sky.blues he has that coolede.down.  my fingers.are.asleep and o cant keep my.right eye open.  So tired here.
My.stomach turns at the thought of Paoli,IN.  Its enchanting,and quiet.  No plaza, or store for an hour.

I grow queesy when I think about leaving home od

Just a Second

The parents were large always colorful and Skitas favorite creatures or bird.  She would hold them by their big claws hooked around her forearms.  There was a large outdoor birdcage in her resort property in some part of Mexico where Skita was married.

The long beeks and claws could take a toe off.  A finger could be nipped off by the parrots nature when least expected. I wouldnt want to hold one of those fruit loop birds.

Courage, curiosity, exploration, and discovery were phenomenal gifts human nature possessed and the mystery of each second those tropical island feathery fellas brought to people only kept me several feet further than my usual walking line.

Ive seen parrots in the Chicago north spot of Damen and Lincoln St. three of them and I asked how much do the parrots cost?  $600_800.00. And then I asked how long do they live?  70 years if I recall.  Or 700 yeArs one of the two and then it dawned on me that Skita and my grandma had a parrot, red,greed,yellow sunflower eating thing named Loretta.

Loretta set such a mark such an impression on us we still talk if her today as a part of our family.  She screached alot and didnt talk not really.  And so impressionable I am, I appreciate all Skitas pictures if her and parrots wherever she would vacation as a favor to Loretta a dearly loved emblem of exotic wonder, love, and unique normalty once in childhood where youth and innocence were once salvation to a fast life of the working race aging, and aching away.

2016 at the lake county fair I couldnt get myself to give more than a few seconds to Skitas joy in parrots.  As she cozied up to take a snap shot of a parrot on her arm these owners wouldn't allow her to move them and that said, she could only have a snapshot next to these exotic creatures of God on their pegs.

Maybe because of our new children is why my world ,her,world took a new direction into motherhood of our own maybe not.  It could have been an instinct a new direction of caution and know how as newborns were now in our own levels of survival and life as we once knew it bamboozled present and future.  Maybe I needed to give one more second to the moment of truth before turning away for tradition or and honor.

Simpley

Sont tou need vegetables? No.  As I take initiative to pick up vegetables Im not.hungry or working to buy them.  Snow is falling and I am thinking about the misery of picking out a bag of carrots.  Maybe I'll make carrot cake that'll make me feel better.

The bag of carrots in my arms have made it past the chip,juoce, and bread aisle.  And bakery.  My eyes were saddened yet my belly gladdened.  Maybe thats what is meant by the saying your eyes are bigger than your stomach.

My new dinner carrots baked in oven with oil and salt.  Boiled vegetables or stewed drain away all the vitamins and so does the oven.  I assume the oven will burn all the nutrients away.

A lot has.gone on to actually say simpley vegetables go a long.way.  It's hot in the house well it may be my brain.  Logically, normalty is potatoes.  Raw carrots no.  Well its six pm and dinner is some kind of vegetables.  Carrots.  So what can I make with.carrots tonight? What?  Thought youvhad a plan, peal and bake em.  Close enough.

But its December who eats carrots?  Enchiladas? No carrots.  So as the battle rocks my stomach with vegetables and meat dinners, my hands reach for a sloppy joe bigger than my head.  And my future spells out a dream for that fit body and young feeling again.

These are the rewards Ive claimed to work outs and daily veggies.  Yet my December has always been this way, with dessert too and a dabble of this and that.  But maybe.this year Ill really do it. Eat those carrots.

So back to simpley carrots.  They are orange for one. All other veggies are green.  At least the right.ones.  and you can  make a carrot cake if all else fails.  Ill do it for my design and for Ethan.

KRIS KRINGLE look out!

Waking early morning snow melting its first first layer from the roof tops.  Heat is cranked.  It's warm and toasty as my engine gets running to start the day.  It's just another day in Indianas NW region.  Here the winters last more than any one cares to see as ice coats the streets.

Tis the season.  All the best prayers come and go when they need to be year round. Candycanes, wreaths, and lights wrap around trees and light posts.  Unforgettable sunrises crusted by snowy horizons, and 36 years of this is timeless.

Kris Kringle is coming I hear in stories and songs all month long in December. Holiday cheer with holiday fear prepared a blackberry and chocolate mud pie.  Apple fritters, and recipes for the Dutch Baby.

I'm revved up for roasted vegetables from brussels to carrots sliced, oiled and salted. Thrown in oven on parchment paper at 350 for 20 minutes.  The delicious tastes of chex mix ingredients came yesterday and for the first time my own mix was a failure.  All the tastes must habe burnt off in the oven.

Negative temperatures below freezing are coming and no one can bre ready enough unless the largest down feather coat is invested in.  Buying gifts for the thought that counts motive will get you every time.  What happened to the child like joys and sweet tooth pleasures?

Sitting at 36 years old, in gym stretch pants, and my carb list is all I can afford today to lose.  I hate to say the surprise in life has felt more beautiful and controlled.  I dont remember which is better.  Watching the movie markee, worrying about city driving, and carbs here in the small town of St.John, IN, nestling in the bed with baby blues and old Christmas movies such as Big, or Scrooged from my time has turned into a movie marathon of Everest, and Polar Express.

Taking walks at your own risk and joining parties with family bliss at this time of the year are probably the most well worth times of celebrating fitness and wealth.  So what happens to the rest of the year?  Work, and no play make a full day? Say that to the unemployed and watch them draw a blank. House work, and baby blues have their silver linings.  But pitch that cigar and good health will be in your findings.

Kris Kingle come jingle my wrinkles, kidding.  All this time what are doing for Kris's arrival?  Hes not a ufo, or a foe.  Have you looked up Kringle in the phone book?  Kidding.  I recommend those crunches and bunches of oats to get on the side of the year a best Took.

Movie Critic Noghtmare

Ahhh, the heavens take me to the show.  Nothing feels better than seeing a bumch of superhero previews mixed with the same actor grouped together for another comedy.

First day of snow.  A wet globe of white slush.  Ethans first snow.  The movies of stars from decades of amazing movies brings a silly madness of confidence and coirage after coming out of the big dark theatre of childhood dreams on the big screen.

And even still only a few things matter, a laugh, a tear, and a little scare from a motion picture that stays in the heart where family cancelled.

Frittata Ya

The morning stArted out as a gloomy very cold sleety secret.  Amazing yet depressing and it seemed extraordinary when Ethan my six month year old wakes up at six am.  As an early bird gets his work I am able to start eating early.

The eight eggs stirred up with lots of cheese, and chopped up carrots and onions.  Heated oven to 450 degrees and chopped Brussels sprouts.  Oh crap im in the theatre.  Mom always said watch the movie.  Oh no gotta go.

The Things.We.Miss

Those.extra calories creeping around the house waiting to live in the wrong places and faces. The holidays are back, the heavens take on entirely different altitudes dipping low or feelings of highs soaring all around to  a complete stop.

An IT Santuary

The heavens take and give a mending spirit. Layers there must be of the heavenly realms spirited and weightless.  They're the places where anything is realized at all costs at all times.

Theres no place then like home.  Its 2016, there is no television, radio,cd or dvd player in my room.  I used to jave a Apple nano until I washed it in a pair of jeans.  It was so memorable with that tiny music downloader.  Traveling by car,bike,jogging baby music despensers were the the best thing since walkmans.
The holidays are back and better than ever before with the Android Galaxy 5.  What a peachmaker of conversation over boring or sensitive crowds.  So sweet and so much to learn about the worlds hobbies with radical technology to get me up and moving forward with speed and effective ways.

I was accused for impatience and God brought broadband connection between the lines of chaos and change in advance ments im behind in.  I guess thats why they call it the blues for the naturally sloward ive been myself.  Its sluggish without a room of your own these days full of gusmos and gadgets so I use my parents things which is a bummer so take good care of what your own.

Well I have this phone that seems to know alot more than any source on media portables, and I could and do spend all my time on it with how tos, music, and movies.  For a hundred a month in dollars I stay home and wiz through the latest in fitness, nutrition, and fashion yet still a day late and a dollar short from modern day lifestyles.

But who cares no big deal.  I want more so I can be where the Little Mermaid says it best, where the people are...you see suddenly I am living on my own for at least a decade with my parents a phone call and a expressway or two away then Im back in a their home an earshot and a staircase away.

After much persuasion I realized you cant get better cooking than at home so now here we are estranged and breached by a bridge of life under one roof with so much to show and tell of the heavens where a handful of years at Indiana University, and then another handful and a couple toes of years in North Chicago for me are my choices before I got pregnant and gave birth to Ethan who is only the size of my thigh and brings around a hunk most days of the week that I can stare at the while time, his dad.

I wouldnt have another baby after the things on such a timed schedule needed to be done such as blood work, and ultrasounds.  Its devastating to lose a job, a boyfriend, a friend, or possessions yet the risks of losing your baby is beyond any power or control of reasoning.   The heavens take on entirely a new path for a mother  a heaven more beautiful than anything in this world.

Alright that last paragraph took a timeless amount of thought.  God how difficult and draining writing can be when you get home for the holidays and there's nothing to do in your room while keeping the rest of the rooms required staying out of them until Turkey Day.  Man I love technology it's less paper,ink,and space to take up.

I mostly read other mother stuff, wonder how others do this or that.  Stubborn I guess.  Well Ill be so set when Ironman gives me all his hologram computers and titanium  gettups. So sweet. So unreal.

Meal replacement day 1-4

The changes from eating my regular egg fritattas with onions, carrots, or potatoes to mixing a banana into a fiber and metabolism powder with almond emulsion in a blender with a protein powder was phenomenally youthful!

I was able to enjoy my sleep and routines without any drowsy or dizzy feelings from hunger or nutrient deficiency.  I didnt eat breads or cookies and only snacked on a grw nuts and snack candy left from Halloween.

Im about three shy years from forty and the meal replacements made feel in my early twenties dancing and dressing up to go out with friends. While the hunger pangs grew worse I waited until they passed with a few cups of.hot green tea or wAter. At times I wanted to start eating an egg fritatta and I did since.these have protien and veggies.

I stayed away from the french fries and other fast food frenzied drinks and salty hot dogs or meats.

I was so consumed by getting these meal replacement s down with comfort that I skimped on fitness plans.  Instead I doctered up my new meal replacement piwder with ice and bananas.  My amazement grew back for lifes mysteriously unanswered fitness.and nutrient deficiency questions again.  Without extra calories or sugar this three days with out the dullness and mundane patries and sneaking paranoia that lead me to shame or guilt when I looked in the wrong places of my body images through the mirror vanquished and I was filled with better qualities such as vibrance, calmness, and humor in reading the extra calories in my food journals.

Although my self image changed dramatically after just a few days of meal replacements, I knew when my powder drink friend was gone id go back to fast food calories and.carbohydrates. Realizing I was not a sprinter,or runner I needed to keep the 1200 calorie mark in check.

 I went back to floured breakfast breads, and painfully sweet treats such as the discointed holiday chocolate chip fudge covered marshmallows within the next three hours my fritatta was finished too.

Struggling to stick to water,coffee,tea,and lowcalorie snacks the trip to produce aisle was keeping my hopes up to continue my weight loss journey.  I ate baked carrot sticks called fries with oil and salt. Thank God I liked them too.  Brussel sprouts too.

Took deep breathers through the hunger pangs when my sugar was low. And calories plumpeted.  And the beat goes on while I wait for the next meal replacement powder to come over.  In the mean time how many ways a hard boiled egg or egg white can be cooked is my challenge.  Joy.

The Small Price Tag on Cool

Chicago was at large the most beautiful city at dawn as the sun rose full view from my bus ride into work on Lake Shore Dr. It was the only other time I turned to gaze to the east long enough to feel the pain.  The pain of time wiping out my days faster than the blink of an eye.

Just as I felt the charge of a golden sun shimmey yellow light on the skin on my arms and the density of my eye lashes through the shadows in and out of the windy cities cold wintery white frosted terrain, warm coffee from a small cup without a lid tumbled in large drops onto my black mini skirt running down black stockings and into the softest black suede boots without heels in all of the world.

A job interview covers the neatness and cleanliness of appearance. And the scent of coffee soaked into the seams of my new clothes and handbag which was placed nicely next to my right knee in length and covering all my identification papers.

There are times I couldnt take back that set up my track record of tomorrow. I didnt do this , I didnt do that, so Im here, where are you at?  I dodnt think id dream again, sink, or link my friend.  Too many tomorrows, a holier sorrow for you and me.

Go Cubs Go 2016 mean and Clean

2015 and the Cubs are doing fine.  No man is an island and as a Sox fan I think watching the game yesterday eas.alright.

Cubs are going to the World Series!!!!!
Celebrate with you instead of alone in the house.  Wrigleyville is quaking with Cub FANS living the.name out Wrigley be wild tonight and get ready for.the company of the World Series meets the Cubs once again after decades.

Final score Cubs and Dodgers 5-0. Holy Smokes.  Right.at.home in sweet.homeChicago.  Russell, Bryant, Rizzo, outstanding fellsas way to go go .go.

Nice to see so much joy in the game and team work with Maddon too.  Fun is key and these players showed sparks flying from head to toe.  First to home, and grandslam this week yowsa.

Where do time and space take a team full of gusto and fuego? WhAt are you passionate about? If you cant see it watch these guys play baseball.  The transformation of baseball has been metamorphed by the right time and place drawn out from the Cubs division whose stars burn right into the World Series of 2016. The year Ethan Warnecke was delivered from a Cesarian birth.

6am kindly suggested to go to Chicago while my sister went into the ER for stomach pain.  Mom wouldnt share much about it as usual she keeps me waiting or in the dark over family events. Privacy is very difficult yet crucial to our.family.  Sorry google keeps me posted about mostly everything accept for family functions such as when cycles of long limited and cruel silences work better over painful words waiting.so orbit and heal mysteriously.

Cubs won the world series.  The parade was at 11a and we stayed home watching it on television.  Didnt know it was on.  I was.upset.already Ethans dad.couldnt be over the one game.he missed he was home not with his son.

And Cubs won!  Celebrate we did we shure did.

2016 Baseball and Babies

When I look at my son my heart turns right around!  Without a doubt in my mind my son Ethan makes me the happiest mom I've ever known to mankind.  When he looks at me with that little cookie dough ball face and watches me with those little chocolate chip size eyes I feel my whole being ignite and light up.  This precious little gift from God has become unimaginable joy in my heart.

When I found out months ago I had a cancerous cyst on my ovary during my pregnancy God couldn't pick a better time to bare the news!  I never felt so much courageous and calm.  I expected devastation and suffering to follow yet with Ethan waiting to come into the world and me beings the one to endure that responsibility my mind was set only on this little boy not even out of the womb to see and feel and taste what life would have for him.

When I found out the cyst was cancer free and would be monitored for the rest of my life the news was earth shaking, yet having the news of becoming a mother surpassed anything else in the way.  In other words, this little boy changel my whole world more than anything I've experienced in my thirty six years.

This is the year Hilary and the Donald were elected to run for office, and the Chicago Cubs won the World Series. There was a sad goodbye to nothing.  Everything is still where it was before I became a mother.  Of course I get pegged .

Just rough.  Passing through the 3rd trimester was a good dream.  It's the last month you hear about your status and the norms of your life and baby'sfirst breath.  Videos enough to deliver anywhere.  Movies enough to make it look easy and convenient even darn right good.

You can't remember you're partners name some days he becomes "dad".  And you can't put 2 and 2 together.  You play U2 songs on repeat when the antacids are backfiring you took so many.  You feel like a trader to your family and a two face to your friends after your own body has betrayed you with high sugars and retained water. Wow!

You are still you somewhere in the cocoon.  In the container God made for your baby,  your entire being who deserved all the joy in the world and you get it.

I still can hear him crying and the ilder he gets.the better with crying he gets.  Doctors were right learn the cries and meanings.  Amazing simply a newborn laughing, or yelling.  Very pure and as fresh as the new wind s of fall.

Just pitiful is the learning of talking, and crawling.  Saddens.me to see them so trusting of to be fed, cuddled, and changed of diapers.  A mother cannot tire from these things.  Sharing him is.erven more.challenging more so while.living with ruthless and relentless



When was your first baseball game and where?  Well, I remember the why I went to a baseball game
 and it was to see what drew in such a continuous fan base all season.  When I was younger I didn't watch sports let alone baseball.
My dad bought one of those little umbrella hats with blue and red colors to keep out the rain at a Cubs game once and that was my only memory of
a sports game.  When friends, family, or strangers asked which team I liked best I learned to say that I'm a fair weather fan, and that I enjoyed
both the Sox and the Cubs.  Then I turned 36 years old, and maybe that age had to do with it but I wanted a baby and had a son whose dad inspired me
to watch the Cubs.  I sat with our newborn for 2016 summer and fall games of the Cubs and didn't realize how exciting they were to watch with all the
fun and heart and soul in baseball.  When the Cubs were lead into the National Division I couldn't believe how great it was to see them win the playoffs.

Suspense grew steamy and the temperature for baseball was hot.  It was every night in my basement watching the Cubs on the flat screen that drove me
to watch the game from inning 1 to the 9th inning when I could stay up and keep my eyes open.  Hendricks getting hit by a line drive, Rizzos robust
homeruns, Fowlers comebacks, Ariettas charm, Monteros grandslam, Kowasakis speed, Hayworth's spirit, and all their gifts and talents combined to play ball.  Pinch hitters in game one at the
start surprised me and agitation grew making my skin crawl while the back of the hairs on my neck stood up.  In my opinion, Kyle S. and the other pinch hitters threw my pattern off of the line up
as the game 1 of the World Series sky rocketed in flight.  I'm used to seeing the communication of regular players and following their behavior or performance patterns so I couldn't bite my
tongue so easy with good grief about why and reasons as to team work would be and was dampened by the adjustments, the earth for me as the Cubs transitioned into the World Series.  I felt a
silence in the house for a moment, so memorable time stood still; you would have thought it was Christmas Eve when the Cubs and Indians were going to play in the World Series.  Who could be
better prepared than they can, and fans on the news lining up at Wrigley Field and Wile bars to watch the game on the televisions the year my son was born, a mark only love can make and go
down in world history!  Go Cubs Go!  The year of Trump vs. Hilary in the presidential campaign, and the comic hero's batman vs. superman?  here comes a valuable time in history for Baseball as
the Cubs play the Indians in the world series.

There is a roster of Cubs players for 2016 and while I've only seen the same line up there probably all very talented players with a lot to offer waiting to be on the baseball field.  Last year the
Bears were on every Sunday at Ethan's dads house and Monday night most of the time.  This year with the Cubs making the World Series, there isn't one Bears game on by Eric, Ethans dad hence, a
very poor fan of the Bears and Cubs considering when they are losing he turns the tube off. Nevertheless, he has been a diehard fan since he was born and is proud to watch them both with his son today!
  On the flip side no one has time to stay up until midnight it seems while these Chicago teams are played late in the night here in NW Indiana, the Region, Central Time.  As a mother I manage to
keep up with sports 36 years later.  Before these pastimes were a tickle and a whisper in my ear
brushing in and out, I don't  or didn't have much interest to keep up with sports before my newborn son, so maybe that's why I've fallen for the Cubs this year as they took my breath away winning
the World Series to top the cake.
I can't get enough of the pitchers this year for what its worth they are solid, and outstanding from every team the Cubs played against from the games I've caught and for one week watched
religiously while nursing my infant in my parents basement.  The more I FELT FOR THEM the more I spotted how amazing they played and their performance records grew on me.  Watching Rizzo
jump in the crowds for the ball, and run that extra mile giving 120 percent as first basemen, Jake, and Jason pitching wow, and Lackey superb.  Contreras, Bias, Russell, even Kawasaki, and Zebras
gelled to the field with catches and  base runs that moved me from the couch to jump for joy this year. 
Bryant, and Hendricks man, blew my baby brain away with the way they took one for the team come rain or come shine.  How do they keep up with the injuries and keep such youth, stealth,
vibrance, enthusiasm in Kyle and Kris as the twinkle in their eye was the air in my lungs for this hearty, wholesome, and wistful group of fun determined diligent ball players with a solid as rock
coach called Madden the World Series were bound to be all of theirs sooner or later, and as the World Series of 2016 fly by, my laundry and left overs are slowly chipping away while I sleep with
one eye open to see the Cubs and Indians shake the earth with stamina, and endurance.  Go Cubs Go! Coughlin.

My Gosh! There is Tomorrow

What to make...for me it all seems to go with breakfast first. My mind is set for fat loss and I'm eating sweets galore.  Muscle doesn't come over night. And a little chocolate goes a long way!

Im supposed to go for walks thirty minutes a day instead I tell my self I'll double it up tomorrow.  Go for an hour walk and instead jump rope today oh and since it's cold and rainy ill definitely feel better walking tomorrow.

Maybe if I close.my.eyes today al little tighter then I wont see the extra weight I have around.my stomach.  And ill just.take more notes on all the teas, and pills for weight loss.  They have to work since I see them and meditate on those.fitness.plans and testimonies daily saying.thats me!

And.the journaling is a.tool proven to have for weightloss so ill journal and lift a weight or.two because at.least its.somethi.g toward me.goal to lose at least twenty.pounds.  ill just count an estimate a guess of the calories,c  arbs, sugar, fat, and proteins and subtract carbs from the fiber I eat and guesstimate.

No worries since tomorrow I'll double the run time and effort.  So why does the scale still say 190? I probably dont.get enough support, sleep, stress relief, and or my guesstimate a must be colder from the target numbers than I thought so ill just eat less breads since the egg days have been more stablilizing than the bready pizza and fish days. Bummer I really lobe that sneak peak of whats in my dads lunch bag of chili dogs and large fries. Pizza pockets and brownies too.

And my moms pastry bag is a mystery.  Damn how.can my brother in law stat so skinny after eating that chees.danish all to himself.  Aint life grand.  

That oatmeal this morning was meantally stabilizing I mean I brought out the tip of the ice burg weight loss confession here to crack the code of my toning slimming down lifesftyle.  Is this an American dream or a worldwide carnival ride to pass the exercise for something faster and more sci fi? I have all the latest fitness equipment such as a

Rewards come and go so fast I mean I can smell the sweet aroma of bbq steaks from carne sada for dinner tonight, shrimp shishkabobs, and melted chocolate drizzle over coffee.  Rewards are returning to your roots of a stable temple of God by your belly do right.    Thank you Lord for my design!

Trusting my goals are being met and faith is a mystery revealed.  The answers then are there, easy enough and absolute. Yet we must be praising God and first and foremost He is all I need.  there isnt a babysitter like Him.  HE is the creator, the maker, designer, and captain of our vessel.

So latetly, every second counts from sleep and energy building blocks from food to exercise we can see stress is a major player here ive heard on cortisol, a hormone related to stress which connects eith metablic rate levels.  And  We are all individuals who from the cradle to the grave work independently of one anothers gifts and talents, strengths andweaknesses.

There isnt a collaborative effort to improve or move the absolutes knowing that tender loving care and work unite all our hearts together.  So ot isnt the jornaling food alone and excessive weight loss or gain.

Epidemic of Foods Cooked with White Ingrediants: Pleasure=Sugar Story

Pleasantly Plump or Healthy

White Powders and other sugars Cooked in our Food.

By Katherine Reyna

February 2016

 A million books have been published to with cruel kindness on the wake of sugar.  National Geographic for instance describes a fine history of its origin in the middle east where Arabs began a relationship with the white substance.  Can I break the point that sugar and cocaine are two of a kind in their richness to bring pleasure and healing.  Why then is one legal and the other dose illegal?  Both have discovered great amounts of luxury and posh to the Western Society.

After reaching into the hands on understanding of sugar intake, I have seen cocaine intake in the same regard just not in a pretty pastry.  My father said it is similar to the choice of jumping from a high rise tower roof top and drowning.  One death is a slow and painful death, while the other death is fast and painless.  This comparison with cocaine and sugar brings another point across of the levels of doses taken makes a difference in the matter of bodily harm to one self and others.

Thirdly, one is legal and the other is illegal for obvious reasons of sugar bringing memory lapses, mood swings, weight issues, mental fuzziness, and other real symptoms with the irony of balancing your blood sugar naturally to avoid disease, lose weight, gain energy, and feel great.  In Sari Harrar's The Sugar Solution, weekly food plans, exercise steps, and stress data has reached to many books format of a whole lifestyle change.

Access sugar is found in all foods for flavor, and added sugars are a common habitual pleasure for everyone: cereal, oatmeal, or fruit are a few foods with added sugar.  Fruit alone has sugar, and so do all foods.  Carbohydrates break down into sugar, and in The Complete Idiots Guide to Type 2 Diabetes simple strategies, expert advice, and thorough examinations by Mayer B. Davidson, M.D., and Debra L/ Gordon explain that following the diet plan on page 82 will keep control over blood sugar levels.

Portion sizes, and carbohydrates for diabetes diets described in Dr. Buynak's 1-2-3 Diabetes Diet book with Gregory L. Guthrie brush on the making of realistic goals that way they will be attainable such as exercise with variety and any time you can make it happen.  Watching and hearing about sugar on the radio and in conversation I feel may show less than meets the eye and ear.  We can all put a piece of candy in our mouth with no account at all and eat what we assume is better for us than something else easily and very often.

Sometimes we see the light through a new article or a doctors book.  As we stick to our regular pleasures of eating we see the only changes we make in health and wellness consideration is off the latest fashion fitness lust of hot bikini model of the month or sexiest male body builders secrets.  In reality we are bummed out by our lack of lacking anything with everything at our hands from vitamins, to gym equiptment.  What puts our fingers on that last cookie, or the first potato chip?  What keeps us looking at the wrong thing to avoid or distract the real ailment? 

For years reading nutrition labels have shown me portion control and consistency in daily food moderation to the extent that when I do go over the norm of my calorie numbers, carbohydrate numbers, I become more tired, and fatigued.  I believe sugar will do that to you.  STill every day the agreements are about the exhausted measures of daily, weekly, or yearly even momth to month weight gain yet no loss yet.

Children are mostly at home these days with a full home entertainment system and the idea that its safer indoors than going outside to play.  From injuries to kidnappings, bullies don't come around anymore.  Or do they?  Lets stay on subject.  "We see that the growing rate through surveys of pleasantly plump to obese children begin their career of video games and computer sitting for 61/2 hours a day minimum while the diabetes epdiemic estimates 11 million Americans with type 2.  Another 5.9 million may have it but not know it."  Ch13 of The Sugar Solution, 2004, Harrar, Sari. 

So whose the real bully?  Maybe the way you raise your children or the childs personal choices made early on to lead to over wieght tragedies.  In Harrar's book the Sugar Solution she spends time in covering these major areas through 3-4 Chapters and you know why?  Because the problem with eating, excerising, and dealing with the peer pressures of stressful choices to be the cool parent can start at conception.  During pregnancies mothers are forewarned to spend a minimum of 30 minutes a day with physical activity to build muscle that will manage blood sugar.

In the 1980's growing up my sister and I had a balance of going to play outside, and indoor activities.  Stopping for lunch and big breakfasts were a big deal in our upbringing all the way to our twenties.  Then during adulthood the long 8 hour desk jobs to fast food service jobs sent us into a downward spiral of long sedintary days and high sodium foods.  The masses of bus riders, and large before and after work traffic jams not to mention may have kept us pleasntly plump also. 

My sister turned over a new leaf and started a career in physical fitness as we struggled putting on a smile after our grandmother died from kidney failure a symptom of diabties while our own mother was on her way with the same fate.  As we spiraled with highs and lows of what to eat and how much to exercise the battle seemed uncontraollable.  I begin opening books and helath magazines, journaling my physical activity, food choices, and late night alcohol intake in my twenties.  While I turned thirty and decided to abstain from all alcohol choices, my sisters fitness career was growing exponentially with her own business and her personal life choices of healthy cooking, and yogging along Lake Michigan.

Large butter popcorns and fried foods continued plumpet my weightloss and gym workouts, and my clothes begain to rip and tear around my arms and legs.  Growing up vegetables were not shunned and in fact were incorporated well into all meals all the time.  it was excessive eating from stress or nervousness that brought on the comfort foods at all times.  My parents built a kingdom for us t enojy all cultures of foods, and try everything at least once which became an exciting adventure for us living in Chicago were the best food is served and cooked. I remember seeing my parents eat lots of fruits from watermelon to cantelopes whatever was in season and my mother even more so after her onset diabeties; blueberries, raspberries, bananas, and a glass of red wine.

Spending more time in my late twenites rushing to lose wieght put weight on while i ate many many sweets, working in fast food, and loving the fried vegetables.  Learning more and more how to stay on balance with my food choices without faltering isn't easy with the hardwired brain of pleasure and sugary food including many high carb pizzas, and all-American foods such as hot gods and hamburgers.  Which brings me back to the theories of white substances used in our meals such as flour, sugar, and at one time cocaine in the 70's.

It comes and it goes without a warning.  The cramps in my inner feet, and my chest fills with stomach acid so I sleep sitting up if u call that sleeping and roaring memories flood my mind while long walks break the silence. I just want to burp.  It's that to much to ask?  I just want to skim the fat right off as we.do everything else.

So to burn this off this fat belly, I'll eat small meals all day 6-7 maybe instead of 3 large ones.  Then stop eating 3 hours before bed. Anything to get rid of these prolonged suffering and pain.  Excerise has truly made me smile, putting a vibrant youth in my life back.

I can't tell you too just how spectacular it's been since I quit cigarette smoking and alcohol. The changes have been out of this world and  I don't look back much anymore since the conception of my newborn.

I feel up there with all those who truly want to become body builders today more than ever!  I looked up the other day over the numbers for a shakes sugar, calories, and carbohydrates along with the new coffee concoctions which are to say astronomical and so I thank God for unanswered prayers of a sweet drink half off all because of the sale and the spurn of the moment pleasure reception my body gets from my sugary choices.

The anger cloud uplifted from over my head, and so did the insecurity, and bad choice making within the rest of the day.  I was full of peace and clear of my rude moods of strange behaviors such as suckling in my gut and staring at myself in agony in the mirror.  Last night I could focus and see faster and more effective changes in my workouts results such as consistency since I wasn't zonked out after a pizza and ice cream shake. And I felt longer bouts of satisfaction everytime I passed on extra breads, and sugars.

So seeing that a kid shake has over 100 grams sugar how is this allowed by law officials? It would do a great service to mothers and small children to examine to dangers of sugar out there in our fast foods, and in our homes junk food drawers disrupting study time, emotional development, and physical development for our youth and young adults going into college and their workforce performance, health, saftey and happiness.

I'm in my late 30s now, and barely making it on my own with fitness magazines, and a set of dumbbells with gym membership contracts, peer pressures, grocery store sweets, and a hunger that is always looking for more carbs, more sugars, and calories to fill a never ending appetite.

I was never one to endure the right mind set, and friendships to a healthier life and always assumed I was healthy naturally and believed I was the one who could afford to sneak two more pieces of chocolate on a daily basis while vegetables made me feel starved.

The struggle is making longer weeks with stabilized food and fitness choices. Secondly, to get more sleep is a crucial part of body building, and last but not least meditate with others to rid the toxins out of my body in this journey to keep going to the top and letting go of the blood  sugar spikes and drops.

Heartburn Scenario

I'm put myself in others shoes. Vomiting too many heartburn chews only to get more heartburn in the middle of the night.
I ate a can of fruit in case vomiting came again and I wouldn't be dry heaving like some dying coseerpse. I want to see substance come out with the toxic turmoil it'such more colorful.

The comfort of the cell light from a self sent text can be a chance I take to wait and watch a little longer.  Not to give in to this pattern of thoughts haunting and brewing in the mind.  Where do we go and keep going with all this real stuff? Stuff of what we can't let go or lose?  The uncertainty is a harbor eventually for opinions and views all around trading, bargaining, and navigating the doubts of ideals.

Always on a different page a boss of mine told me repeatedly ur as good as a dead horse which made me laugh yet when he said I was sitting on a winning lotto ticket he got my attention. And I would look very day at him the way someone would when they found a winning lotto ticket under their tushy.

 As acid reflux heats up the esophagus I can only hope the next morning will hurry it's way up as the saliva Thickens, and my tear ducts swell with hot salt water settling down as usual does nothing for indigestion, a softened stomach acid blocker, and dieting isn't always an option.  We need fruit yet fruit causes heart burn? We don't eat left over pizza after parties why? Because the new main ingredient is cigarette ashes and or snot from sneezes or hockers.

There is nothing worse than heartburn when it comes and goes through its course. There is nothing that compares to the way it feels in the neck and back along the spine.  No other charges can feel this burn more than the strain and pain of indigestion.  There is no other way around the dreadful heartburn expect though an antacid.  Just when you think it's gone it comes back.  I'm so relieved after a couple antacids. But during the moment of truth the heartburn is more or less the feeling of a hot blade severing through the spinal cord and flesh.
I never wanted to invite this problem or welcome it to stay around and come back and forth between 8p-9p most days of the week.  There is no place better than away from the moment indigestion attacks.  There is no longer wish than the wish to receive the relief of this very sharp suffocating grasp such as indigestion.

Last night a cold and hot smoke like sensation seized my esophagus for a couple hours.  The strain in my neck, left side of my face and eye were probably muscle reactions  that caused the vomit to stay down.  I can't  say.  Staying calm and forgetting the moment was impossible so I sang psalms 23 quietly.

I succeeded in not vomiting hot bile or acid reflux.  It was very good to not vomit that terrible stuff.  I read online comments from antacid reviews and heard these pills strip away prenatal pills benefits.  God bless America.

After wanting my mom to stay with me until the moment ended, she instead told me not to call her again and left the room after my pain grew too intense for words and I threw my antacids.  She mumbled about the mess in the kitchen and I realized I was better off without her comfort around with my frustration bumbling and her lack of intuition or instincts.

The acid from my stomach feels as if it is seeping up my throat in my sleep.  It wakes me after too much eating or for instance too much of a good thing is digested.  Last night before bed it was a 2 table spoon peanut butter smoothie with ice and whey protein, accompanied by a splash of prune juice.

Jumping Rope

Of course jumping rope can feel so very fast and easy for the heart and feet.  There in the alleys of Chicago rope jumping so many repetitions has brought great physical fitness.



There was a chance to park for me where empty spaces permitted to jump rope. I jumped in parks, and parking lots all over Chicago.   There isn't a place you can't jump rope.

When I was in traffic I'd pull over to a parking lot and jump rope, and while I was pregnant I wouldn't jump rope, although it was attempted.  There wasnt much excersie except when I had my jump rope and at we tons of egg white smoothies.

Scorching body fat, this wasn't a great muscle builder with my gend and inconstistancy.

I practiced light foot steps when I jumped on the second level of my apartment complex.  There isn't much else to do for cardio that involves using alert attention on all your body.


I cant believe the jump ropes work.  Man it shakes and bakes muscles.